had four children in iron lungs during that other pandemic, and she drove to the edge of a cliff in Montana and held her breath mostly for them and a bit for herself until she exhaled and drove back home, and then many years later when she wasn’t feeling well and her voice sounded far away and life was like looking through a telescope, I was massaging her feet and she asked me if I was a massage therapist and I said no and she said she felt like she was on a runaway train and then told me about a dream where she was in a house full of crying babies that she could hear but not find